The Drive By Wedding

Damian called me a few weeks ago and asked if I would marry him… to Lisa.  It would be a drive by wedding and since we live in Pennsylvania a self-uniting marriage was an option.  Why Damian asked me, I don’t know, but he was willing to change the wedding date to accommodate my schedule.  July 1st was the big day.  Damian and Lisa had some serious family issues to deal with the week before, the night before and the day of.  Lisa’s mom, Nancy, was in the hospital and Damian’s Dad, Joe, thinks he suffered a minor heart attack. But that’s one of the things about commitment, determination and patience, Damian & Lisa were going to become Mr. & Mrs. on July 1st and that is what happened.

Something else happened.  But this something stunned and confused me, until I recalled my words at the ceremony.  Prepared with a prayer, rose petals and cedar smudge, Lisa, Damian, Lisa’s Dad Joe, Lisa’s sister Shannon, Lisa’s soul sister Angelique and I stood under the magical Magnolia Tree.  While Lisa & Damian stood on rose petals, I lit the cedar and asked that all our relations join us.  The spirits of those who had gone before, and those that will follow, were invited to be a part of this ceremony.  I joked that if I started to speak in Italian we’d know for sure that they showed up.  Then we read a prayer* together, I looked up at Lisa & Damian and stated, “You Are Married”.  It was done.  No words of faithfulness, commitment or cherishing.  No rings, no kissing the bride, no vows.  Done.

Damian took over and asked Angelique for the rings.  He said a few words as he slipped the diamond band onto Lisa’s finger.  Lisa said a few words while she slipped the sterling band onto Damian’s finger.  They kissed.  There was a quick photo shoot and then we jumped in the car and went to dinner.

Sitting in the back seat of the car I was wondering, what the heck came over me?  If you know me, you know I have plenty to say, especially in such spiritually infused settings.  However, the words, “You Are Married”, was the best I could do. After about an hour… I heard it.  It was Linda, Damian’s mother.  She not only showed up she spoke up.

Linda was a good friend to me.  When she died on July 28th 2009, she left behind an incredible amount of silly stories, ass-kicking attitude and fantastic imagery.  It makes sense that she would show up and cut to the chase.  It was very hot under that Magnolia tree and Damian and Lisa had already passed all valid tests of their love and devotion.  Why drag it out?  Hell, if it’s a Drive By Wedding, let’s use those hit-and-run tactics.  And we did.  This explanation relieved my stunned and confused state and replaced it with, holy cow… it couldn’t have been better.  My entire body relaxed and I was able to enjoy a delicious dinner with the Drive By Wedding crew.  That crew included Linda, and maybe that’s why Damian asked me to be there.